Joke Thread

[FU I am PeNGuiN]

Don't speak about something you don't have a clue about. Mods can unban themselves if they got disconnected, not if they leave.

lawl you said you quit with dis forum idiot/retard (legit to insult people on la)

ontopic: so funi jokes

[Astaroth]

When I can't sleep, I eat. I heard it's called insom-nom-nom-nia.


A guy comes to kindergarten: "I came for kid"
"Which one?"
"Does it matter? I'll bring him next morning."


Alzheimer can be even good. When I'm old I'll complain and yell "Do you know who I am?"

[Bart]

Wife wakes up the Mourinho in the morning:
- Darling, wake up, its five!

-WHAAAT? Lewandowski AGAIN?

[iNevermore]

Wife wakes up the Mourinho in the morning:
- Darling, wake up, its five!

-WHAAAT? Lewandowski AGAIN?

Thanks alot, now I have to drink something 

[CoMMoN1337]

How do you confuse a blond?

Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

[iNevermore]

Whats the difference between blonde and mosquito?

Spoiler for Hiden:

Blonde doesnt stop sucking when u hit her.

[Dread^Lord]

Wife wakes up the Mourinho in the morning:
- Darling, wake up, its five!

-WHAAAT? Lewandowski AGAIN?

nice one 

[KeMCek]

From MadMan

MadMan: You know what americans eat on Thanksgiving Day Kemcek?
KeMCek: No
MadMan: Turkey
KeMCek: 

[MadMan]

From MadMan

MadMan: You know what americans eat on Thanksgiving Day Kemcek?
KeMCek: No
MadMan: Turkey
KeMCek: 

Ow please )))) it's the best joke you'll ever read in your life you're just too young and in love and can't see the humor in it

[CoMMoN1337]

Girl: Sweety every time I look in the mirror I think I'm getting fat. I need a compliment.

Spoiler for Hiden:

Guy: You have excellent eyesight !

[1QuestioN!]

Girl: Sweety every time I look in the mirror I think I'm getting fat. I need a compliment.

Spoiler for Hiden:

Guy: You have excellent eyesight !

Common i rly must give you +1 for this post , please continue with posts like this one

[MadMan]

Girl: Sweety every time I look in the mirror I think I'm getting fat. I need a compliment.

Spoiler for Hiden:

Guy: You have excellent eyesight !

+1 also

Spoiler for Hiden:

Bha...credeam c-ai murit...te dadusem disparut pe dozele de Timisoreana...sa nu mai dispari asa >.<

[CoMMoN1337]

Y comes home every night very late and bangs his shoes on the wall while taking them off. One day his neighbour X bangs on his door:

X: Can you please stop fucking banging your shoes on the wall while you take them off, you always wake me up.
Y: Oke oke chill I got this.
Next day, X forgot about the encounter from yesterday and while taking one shoe off he banged it on the wall again, then he's like "oh fuck , I forgot, I better not make noise with the other one too", and puts the other one down gently.
After one hour, someone was banging on his door:

Spoiler for Hiden:

X: Can you please bang the other fucking shoe so I can sleep already .

For mady:

Spoiler for Hiden:

Cine pula mea bea Timisoreana, iti place gustul de malai ? Ia si tu un Heineken acolo.

[KeMCek]

From MadMan

MadMan: You know what americans eat on Thanksgiving Day Kemcek?
KeMCek: No
MadMan: Turkey
KeMCek: 

Ow please )))) it's the best joke you'll ever read in your life you're just too young and in love and can't see the humor in it

Madman, my friend. I'm just crying when u make this joke.

[Lagi]

From MadMan

MadMan: You know what americans eat on Thanksgiving Day Kemcek?
KeMCek: No
MadMan: Turkey
KeMCek: 

Ow please )))) it's the best joke you'll ever read in your life you're just too young and in love and can't see the humor in it

It's not funny. Poor turkey.