Author Topic: Joke Thread (Read 52112 times)

dRagoLjuB · « **Reply #90 on:** November 05, 2011, 17:12 »

Ohhh xd
Didnt know it , i ont check funn pics (only some posts xd)

AF_Affliction · « **Reply #91 on:** November 14, 2011, 23:55 »

As seen on my friends wall on facebook (and it's not meant as a joke, it's an actuall conversation)

My friend from high-school (a)
Some dude i dont know (b)

(a) I just went thru all my old photos and I'm really feeling blue 'coz of the old photos of me, when i was 17, young and innocent..
(b) I thought i fucked you when you were 16
(a) I was 15.. and i meant drugs

Astaroth · « **Reply #92 on:** November 15, 2011, 22:15 »

Greel, Irish and Portuguese go to bar and order drinks. Who pays?

Spoiler for Hiden:

Guy goes to principal of circus and asks for a job.
Principal: "What can you do?"
Guy: "I can imitate birds."
Principal: "Everyone can do that, gtfo."
So guy turns around and fly away...

"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."

Chinese minister of defence talks to Chinese prezident: "Mr. prezident, Czech Republic declared war on us."
Prezident: "How many ppl do they have?"
Minister: "About 10 milions."
Prozident: "And in which hotel do they stay?"

What does webmaster hears when he is watching porn? <a> [/url] <a> [/url] <a> [/url] <a> <a> <a> [/url] [/url] [/url]

"Everyone has his own clocks in heaven. They move by 1 hour forward everytime you think of sex. St. Peter uses mine clocks as fan..."

Vector · « **Reply #93 on:** November 22, 2011, 12:04 »

There are 3 men and they are talking.
First man has no legs
Second man has no arms
The third man is blind

1st man talks on the man with no arms: - I'm gonna hit you with my leg!
2nd man tells the first man: - Oh yeah, I'm gonna hit you with my arm in you dumb head!
the 3rd man said: - yaaay I will watch fight!

Djerfi · « **Reply #94 on:** November 22, 2011, 12:08 »

In conclusion, Saint sux.

SaintKnight · « **Reply #95 on:** November 26, 2011, 23:32 »

Quote from: Djerfi on November 22, 2011, 12:08

In conclusion, Saint sux.

You mean 14 people lost mass PSR vs. me

Astaroth · « **Reply #96 on:** November 26, 2011, 23:53 »

Success in 4 years is when your diapers stay dry.
Success in 12 years is when you have friends of same age.
Success in 18 years is when you have driving licence.
Success in 20 years is when you have active sexual life.
Success in 30 years is when you have money.
Success in 40 years is when you have money.
Success in 50 years is when you have money.
Success in 60 years is when you have active sexual life.
Success in 70 years is when you have driving licence.
Success in 80 years is when you have friends of same age.
Success in 90 years is when your diapers stay dry.

Two lawyers went to restaurant for a lunch. Both of them ordered coffee and they took out their own sandwiches from briefcases.
Waitress: "Gentlemen you can't eat your own food in our restaurant!"
Lawyers looked on each other, shrugged their shoulders and swapped sandwiches...

BrownTygeR · « **Reply #97 on:** December 12, 2011, 20:29 »

Chuck Norris is only a stupid actor, if he was that imba as u guys thought, he wouldnt let me write this, he would come to my house and smash my head on my keybo tggrf45da4lksefl2bk456mgrtlkwqasjld83dfg9h53dsg34w5eswfhddf

Tupac Shakur · « **Reply #98 on:** December 12, 2011, 20:33 »

Quote from: Qell_Buraa on December 12, 2011, 20:29

Chuck Norris is only a stupid actor, if he was that imba as u guys thought, he wouldnt let me write this, he would come to my house and smash my head on my keybo tggrf45da4lksefl2bk456mgrtlkwqasjld83dfg9h53dsg34w5eswfhddf

yeah that comment from youtube :xDD

BrownTygeR · « **Reply #99 on:** December 12, 2011, 20:36 »

Quote from: 2Pac^Shakur on December 12, 2011, 20:33

Quote from: Qell_Buraa on December 12, 2011, 20:29
Chuck Norris is only a stupid actor, if he was that imba as u guys thought, he wouldnt let me write this, he would come to my house and smash my head on my keybo tggrf45da4lksefl2bk456mgrtlkwqasjld83dfg9h53dsg34w5eswfhddf
yeah that comment from youtube :xDD

shhhhh

Tupac Shakur · « **Reply #100 on:** December 12, 2011, 20:46 »

Quote from: Qell_Buraa on December 12, 2011, 20:36

Quote from: 2Pac^Shakur on December 12, 2011, 20:33
Quote from: Qell_Buraa on December 12, 2011, 20:29
Chuck Norris is only a stupid actor, if he was that imba as u guys thought, he wouldnt let me write this, he would come to my house and smash my head on my keybo tggrf45da4lksefl2bk456mgrtlkwqasjld83dfg9h53dsg34w5eswfhddf
yeah that comment from youtube :xDD

shhhhh

upsssssss . now where the hell i got it from -.-"

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are running from the cops. They hide on a potato farm. They crawl into some potato bags. The first cop pokes the bag with the brunette in it. She says, "Meow." The cop confirms that it is just a cat. The second cop pokes the bag with the redhead in it. She says, "Woof." The cop says that it is just a dog. The third cop pokes the bag with the blonde in it. She say in her sweetest voice, "Potato."

[kosarkas] · « **Reply #101 on:** December 14, 2011, 17:04 »

The best parfumes in the world have the scent of Chuck Norris' ass and farts and shit xD

)

Bronhi · « **Reply #102 on:** December 16, 2011, 13:25 »

Yo mama so poor she cant even pay attention

yo mama so fat, i took a picture of her last christmas and it's still printing

^_^Gospod^_^ · « **Reply #103 on:** December 16, 2011, 18:25 »

Jesus and the Antichrist were arguing who was better at what. God got sick of it so he said: SHUT THE UP ALREADY! You argue all day and all night. I'll decide who is better with a contest. Well see who is better using computer technology. So they started programming, typing, fixing errors, playing games all to see who was better. 2 days pass and the electricity goes out. The Antichrist starts yelling out: WHAT THE FUCK? EVERYTHING IS GONE EVERYTHING I MADE EVERY HIGHSCORE I GOT EVERY SINGLE DAMN THING I DID IS GONE. Jesus just turns on his computer and everything is there. The Antichrist starts crying out of rage and god declares Jesus the winner. When he is asked how everything he had done was still there, God simply said:Jesus saves.

Bart · « **Reply #104 on:** December 16, 2011, 18:28 »

Polish Joke - Two Poles are talking about their friend who immigrated to America. "Did you hear about Bartek? He opened up a jewellery store after just one year in America!" "How did he do that?" "With a crowbar."